5 things you should not do when raising children
Parenting seems to be a simple occupation only at first glance. In fact, this is a difficult task, because the upbringing process lasts from the first days of a child’s life to his majority, and often longer. Often relationships are based on love and affection, but sometimes circumstances arise when we are forced to be strict and authoritarian with our children. In such cases, we are talking about discipline.
Discipline is very important for the proper upbringing of children. She teaches the child to control their actions and thoughts. Without discipline, the educational process is incomplete. But it’s important not to overdo it. Excessive discipline may not bring the desired results, moreover, in the worst case, it can lead to dangerous behavior in children. Therefore, there are certain things that should not be done in the process of raising children. Let’s consider some of them in more detail.
1. Do not confuse discipline with punishment
This is a common mistake among parents all over the world – they often confuse measures designed to discipline a child with punishment. This is especially true for conservative families. Discipline and punishment are very different from each other and in most cases lead to different results.
Punishment literally makes a person suffer for his mistakes. Punishment can be either verbal or physical. In turn, discipline leads to control and establishes certain rules of a child’s life that are binding. This ensures the correct development of the personality of the child.
2. Do not cause the child to feel fear
Children usually do not understand their parents’ instructions until they feel fear. To cause this fear, parents often use what they think is justified lies. For example: “If you don’t listen to me, the police will take you to prison.” Of course, these threats are unrealistic, but too much dependence on such lies can lead to negative consequences such as low self-esteem or antisocial behavior.
3. Do not encourage child negative behavior
Promotion here means too much attention to the negative behavior of the child. Often, children in this way try to attract the attention of parents, for example, shout or break toys. If you pay attention to this, they even more often begin to resort to such behavior. And this has a negative effect on the upbringing of the child. Instead, use positive reinforcement — reward the child when he is positive.
4. Be unanimous with your spouse
Parents often have disagreements about how to raise a child. If they argue in the presence of a child, he is embarrassed and concludes that discipline is not necessary if the parents themselves do not observe it. Therefore, if you have any disagreements, do not voice them in the presence of the child. Let him think that you both have a common opinion about parenting.
5. Always take timely action.
Make sure that you take all necessary measures in a timely manner. You cannot turn back the clock to solve a child’s discipline problems. The child must understand what he did wrong and how he can correct the situation. Therefore, parents should take their child’s discipline seriously and take all necessary measures in a timely manner.